Being laid off sucks!

Being laid off really sucks, and on more levels than I ever thought to imagine!

There is some psychological mumbo jumbo about how people become who they are thru their jobs, or perhaps it's more that their jobs define them. Seems ludricrous until you experience losing your job. It's at that point that it really hits you how true it may be.

No job is perfect, but if you are in a job like I had where there was enough stuff going on that kept you stimulated, with the oppurtunity to learn more and grow, it's amazing how your life really does become your job. Nobody likes to commute to work, and face the traffic, and the general annoyance of it all, but you learn to deal with it. It becomes a part of your life.

Then there's the pressure of needing to accomplish certain tasks while at work, but again you figure out a way to overcome it, and even feel good about attacking the problems, and stress at hand. It becomes a part of your life.

Of course there are the people too that you deal with on a daily basis. People that you work with every day, asking you to do things for them, and at times you are asking them for things. Personalities can clash a bit, but it all becomes a part of the day. You grow to accept it, and even feel good about the interactions. It's an oppurtunity for growth, and it becomes a part of your life.

Then there's the obvious, which is the consistent income. It pays the bills, and also pays for the things that one likes to buy, be it an object, or perhaps a nice vacation. It becomes a part of your life.

So the job is not just a job. It really just becomes your life. In a sense I guess it does, or at least can, define who you are. Your life revolves around your job, and with any luck, revolves in an overall positive way. It stresses you, but stresses you to be better... to grow... to learn... and to flow down a postive path.

Then one day you are told that your position has been elimated, and it's all over. You collect your things, say your goodbyes, and walk out the door... leaving it all behind.

Not just the paycheck, but the people that you interface with 40 hours a week, the work itself that you have applied yourself to in the best mannor that you could muster, and the future that you were thinking was going to be there for you.

All gone in one fell swoop.

It's no wonder that losing a job rates as one if the top stressful things that can happen to someone.

You get the rug pulled out for under you, but yet you are to forge ahead and simply get a new job, all the time the clock is ticking.

Unemployment hardly meets the financial demands that one has become accustomed to. Aside from that, the whole routine is no longer there. The growth within the job, both on the level of learning the products and becoming a better employee, and the connections with people.

It's all gone.

I guess if one finds a job that is more rewarding than the previous job, then it's all a moot point. One can truly move one, and simply look at the past as a springboard to the now bright future. Ideally that's what happens, and at times it does.

But in the mean time, while one is unemployed, it's a very shakey future, as there is no control.

Sure, one can beat on the doors, and put themselves out there, but it really is a very insecure path. And maintaining a high level of esteem can be tough. I mean, damn... I'm now on the streets with thousands of other people looking for a position in a company that will not only pay the bills, but will bring me the satisfaction that I once had.

And during the journey to find that position, one begins to reflect on ones life, and to look inward.

I mean, just how much of my happiness is tied to the income? Can I forge ahead with my chosen field to the point that I'm willing to do it for far less money than before? Do I need to give up and change careers? What sacrifices am I willing to make?

All this because of the short little phrase "your position has been eliminated".

No... sorry... but it was NOT just a "position"... it was MY LIFE!

A day to day life of doing the best I can for the success of the company, and for the success OF ME! A daily caring of doing the best I know how, regardless of how imperfect it may have been at times. Day to day rising to the occasion, and overcoming the inner barriers to excel... and MANY times feeling good about succeeding.

"your position has been eliminated".

WOW, really! That's it?

Back to sqaure one as they say. Not what I had in mind, but there it is.

FUCK!