Being laid off sucks!

Being laid off really sucks, and on more levels than I ever thought to imagine!

There is some psychological mumbo jumbo about how people become who they are thru their jobs, or perhaps it's more that their jobs define them. Seems ludricrous until you experience losing your job. It's at that point that it really hits you how true it may be.

No job is perfect, but if you are in a job like I had where there was enough stuff going on that kept you stimulated, with the oppurtunity to learn more and grow, it's amazing how your life really does become your job. Nobody likes to commute to work, and face the traffic, and the general annoyance of it all, but you learn to deal with it. It becomes a part of your life.

Then there's the pressure of needing to accomplish certain tasks while at work, but again you figure out a way to overcome it, and even feel good about attacking the problems, and stress at hand. It becomes a part of your life.

Of course there are the people too that you deal with on a daily basis. People that you work with every day, asking you to do things for them, and at times you are asking them for things. Personalities can clash a bit, but it all becomes a part of the day. You grow to accept it, and even feel good about the interactions. It's an oppurtunity for growth, and it becomes a part of your life.

Then there's the obvious, which is the consistent income. It pays the bills, and also pays for the things that one likes to buy, be it an object, or perhaps a nice vacation. It becomes a part of your life.

So the job is not just a job. It really just becomes your life. In a sense I guess it does, or at least can, define who you are. Your life revolves around your job, and with any luck, revolves in an overall positive way. It stresses you, but stresses you to be better... to grow... to learn... and to flow down a postive path.

Then one day you are told that your position has been elimated, and it's all over. You collect your things, say your goodbyes, and walk out the door... leaving it all behind.

Not just the paycheck, but the people that you interface with 40 hours a week, the work itself that you have applied yourself to in the best mannor that you could muster, and the future that you were thinking was going to be there for you.

All gone in one fell swoop.

It's no wonder that losing a job rates as one if the top stressful things that can happen to someone.

You get the rug pulled out for under you, but yet you are to forge ahead and simply get a new job, all the time the clock is ticking.

Unemployment hardly meets the financial demands that one has become accustomed to. Aside from that, the whole routine is no longer there. The growth within the job, both on the level of learning the products and becoming a better employee, and the connections with people.

It's all gone.

I guess if one finds a job that is more rewarding than the previous job, then it's all a moot point. One can truly move one, and simply look at the past as a springboard to the now bright future. Ideally that's what happens, and at times it does.

But in the mean time, while one is unemployed, it's a very shakey future, as there is no control.

Sure, one can beat on the doors, and put themselves out there, but it really is a very insecure path. And maintaining a high level of esteem can be tough. I mean, damn... I'm now on the streets with thousands of other people looking for a position in a company that will not only pay the bills, but will bring me the satisfaction that I once had.

And during the journey to find that position, one begins to reflect on ones life, and to look inward.

I mean, just how much of my happiness is tied to the income? Can I forge ahead with my chosen field to the point that I'm willing to do it for far less money than before? Do I need to give up and change careers? What sacrifices am I willing to make?

All this because of the short little phrase "your position has been eliminated".

No... sorry... but it was NOT just a "position"... it was MY LIFE!

A day to day life of doing the best I can for the success of the company, and for the success OF ME! A daily caring of doing the best I know how, regardless of how imperfect it may have been at times. Day to day rising to the occasion, and overcoming the inner barriers to excel... and MANY times feeling good about succeeding.

"your position has been eliminated".

WOW, really! That's it?

Back to sqaure one as they say. Not what I had in mind, but there it is.

FUCK!

Unemployment form... why does it have to be confusing?

As someone who has recently been laid off (biting my tongue... got to remain professional), I have had to fill out the Unemployment Insurance application. Being the computer savvy person that I am, I went to do it online. Seems easy enough, right? I mean, Christ, what all do they need to know? Employment and salary history, and that's about it, right?

Well, yes, that is about it, but of course being something tied to the government, they had to make it so confusing. "How?" do you ask?
For starters:
They say you must enter any pay due to you from unpaid vacation hours. OK, this makes sense, and right there on my paystub is the vacation hour balance. Great! I'll just enter that number and be on may way. But NOOOOOOOO!!!!

It also asks for a date range. A date range for vacation that I will never take... REALLY?

I don't enter date range as it makes no sense to, and I figure I can leave it blank and I'll continue. Oh, but NO! I try to continue and it says that I MUST enter a date range. Once again, I'm staring at the screen thinking "A date range for vacation that I will never take?... WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I'm baffled, and of course clicking on any help link does nothing but raise my blood pressure. I then Google it, and find that in California, you really don't need to enter the upcoming vacation pay as it's not considered income. So, I end up leaving it blank. I continue to forge through and enter my past year's salary by quarter. Becomes really fun when you've had a pay raise occur mid quarter. Now, is it me, or is it fucking nuts that I have to tell the people my quarterly income... the SAME people who have received from my employer ABOUT ME what my pay has been down to the penny? Oh well, I'll play their game, and will fill out all the details they ask for.

I send it off, thinking all is done correctly.

But NOOOOO! It gets better!

I receive an email from HR of my previous employer stating that I had entered the wrong company as my employer. I'm staring at the email in disbelief! I mean really? I entered the wrong company? Every fucking day for almost 2 years I stare at the sign on the front of the building with the company's name, and somehow I entered the wrong company name? I then look at what the email has provided me as the correct company name, and it's nowhere near what I entered. It appears that the company name should be the name of the place your paycheck comes from. WHAT??!??!?!? I mean, WTF?!???!?!

Unfucking believable!

What really gets me is that the the neanderthal's that conjured up the unemployment application are probably still employed, and making more money that I'll ever see.

People against gay marrriage.. WTF??!?!?!

It just never ceases to amaze me when people get so upset about gay marriage. I mean, really? Personally, for all I care, a person can go marry a goat! I'm serious!!! Why? Because if a man were to marry a goat, it would have ZERO affect on me! If it has no effect on me, then why give a shit?

Yet we have all these people getting all bent out of shape because there are gay people out there who would like to have the right to get married. I guess a lot of the resistance comes from the Christians who think it is immoral. To that I've got two words... FUCK YOU!. If your're a Christian, and are abhorrently against same sex people gettng married, then you know what? Then don't marry someone of the same sex!

However, just because YOU don't think it is right, does not make it wrong for anybody else! I think it's wrong that these extremist Christians have their heads so far up their ass that they can't even think straight, BUT, I am not going to do anything to make it illegal for these idiots to have their stuck up, outdated, and stupid ideas, as that is their right. Isn't that what America is really about? As was once said, "I may not like what you say, but I'll fight to the death for your right to say it".

So, if two adults, who happen to be gay, want to get married, THEN LET THEM! BIG FUCKING DEAL!!! Of course the Christians get their panties all bunched up over this because they believe it goes against God's will. SO WHAT? It's YOUR belief, NOT everyone elses, so leave everyone else the fuck alone! Just because you believe that the bible says something does not automatically make it right!

If you are going to say that whatever the bible says is true, then stick to it. I guess anyone who ever worked on Sunday should then be put to death (Exodus 31:15). So let me ask you this... what day do you want the mass executions to commence? Probably most people in America have worked on Sunday... shame on you... off to the execution you go! Hey, I didn't right this shit, but there it is in the bible, so off you go!

Oh, and by the way, are you going to be selling your daughter into slavery? Says that too in the bible, Exodus 21:7-11. I guess we could setup a special section in eBay for this. I mean, what the heck, might as use our advanced technology to help spread God's will, right? Not sure what a fair price would be though. Perhaps we can rely on the ol' supply and demand scheme.

So, bottom line is this... if you want to cling to the bible for some sort of eternal bliss, or meaning of life, then fine! By all means, do that. If that's what it takes for you to feel fulfilled, then go for it. However, KEEP YOUR STUPID BELEIFS OUT OF OTHER PEOPLES BUSINESS!!! You have NO right enforcing YOUR beliefs on others... PERIOD!!!

By the way, this whole rant came to be after reading about Jane Pitt's letter against gay marriage. So, if you want to see idiocy at its finest, just Google that.